Something to start at dawn

"If you can't fly, run.
If you can't run, walk.
If you can't walk, crawl, but, by all means,
keep moving!"

Kata orang..

This is not a post about "apa kata orang" nor is it about "kenapa orang suka mengata".. but it's about.. Kata orang tua-tua, kalau tak suka tu, janganlah benci sangat, nanti dapat betul-betul, gigit lidah sendiri.. Yes i had to lick back my words for grunting and whinning how much I am going to hate pediatrics and how boorriiinnggg it will be with their "legendary" bossy residents. I admit, I don't have the fine talent to overcome wailing kids nor do I have the talent to charm them, but that 8 weeks of paeds memang gigit lidah sendiri.

I started off with this HEAVY heart and feeling soo tired coz that sunday I was still on duty at VK bersalin and trust me I was intoxicated with the look of a bulging belly and the smell of amniotic fluid... gaaahhhh NO MORE. noo moooree. Then there it was, paeds on monday, a simple hello and the what to do-ness from the head of department and off you go to the jungle. Day 1 was horrible. I met this awfully self-enthusiast resident who loves himself too much and loathes the surgical residents.. "kalian itu semua ky orang bedah, bertindak dulu baru berfikir".. yayaya maybe he was rejected to enter surgery and i don't know why he took paeds as a life option. But what I remembered most was when we had this nephrotic syndrome patient who was on a high dose of steroids, so he was showing me the back hair and telling me how much hair you'll get with the steroids etc... when suddenly the patient's mom said.. "gak koq dok... anak saya memang banyak bulu.. suami saya arab soalnyaa".... ready... get set...... BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA... so much for hypertrichosis huh. But he was my ultimate nightmare for 1 week and he really wanted to give us tutoring + a few hours long of questioning... by which, we ran away before it started. I don't know if he really cares but I was so sure that I don't want to waste my saturday having to hear him speak and nag and yaak..

First week was hell... but that first week I sharpened my ears listening to various types of heart murmurs, that was something that I will never forget for the rest of my life.. and that was the week i met this little being with this heartbreaking blue fingers of the tetralogy of fallot. I called her smurf out of earshot. Kids with series of tet spells are the best. They sound like a machine during the episodes (eventhough it's really scary and fatal) and you can tell them from 5metres away, but I had one dead after repeated series of tet spells.. yes, people.. it's sad to go home with a coffin when u came in with a stroller or gendongan. One dead kid, and you'll see the other parents hugging their kids even more tighter. Heartbreaking i tell u.

And the week goes by even more eventful and heartfilling more than i expected. I met new kids, so many variations of diseases, so many types of parents and the laughter and smile of sick, is very expensive.

Expensive kan? cute pun ye.. for the whole 8 weeks.. i was battling inside.."why am i soo into paeds... like every bits of it".. I actually stay till late evenings to check on my patients and interact with them and play with them and actually come so early and full spirited to follow up.. and duty... eventhough most of my ward duties were like this:

and turned me into this in the middle of the night:

nahhh.... until i had the ultimate most idea of having my own childrens' hospital... nahhhhhh.... who jilat what now??? and i never imagined myself being this happy carrying a sick kid..

Yes people you will never see that smile again :P and please excuse the kid for looking sad.. he's a great actor! He's this penunggu pintu every morning for me to come and will sit next to me while I update patients' status until he falls asleep and will somehow speak after a stormy post-BMA mood, when he sees me.. am I jinxed or what? I used to be this.. I am hardcore and I don't mingle with kiddos too much... went crashing down the hill when I entered paeds... yes... who jilat whaaatttt???!!

Days of this.. postcall fatigue


is always turned into a huge smile when we see this...

and for the record, this baby is just an hour old and all saliva-ish everywhere after we accidentally touched her without washing our hands.. after eating sate kerang... it's ok kid, it's waay tastier than milk!

And in paeds, you will also get to collect fans... like this doctor..


this 4 year old girl actually ran up and down to this table to get noticed coz she wanted a photo with this doctor! see those red cheeks :D and that shy smile?? and guess what happened after she got her picture taken??? she screamed down the hall at the top of her lungs and said "ibuuuuuuuuuu aku foto sama dr andriaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnn"....... EPIC. Kids these days, at a very tender age they're already very expressive!

So that was paeds.. oh I forgot to mention.. I met two awesome foreigners along that 8 weeks.. Raymond who hailed from NUS and Julia from chicago... they made me look at paeds at very different angle and that 8 weeks, I finished paeds, with a smile.. and a darling. oops.

Hopefully one day, that dream of having my own childrens' hospital will come to reality and no I won't be the attending pediatrician but the attending pediatric surgeon.. Amin :)


*i really did gigit my own lidah*