At one point of life, I decided to go free and alone.Just tired of trying to make do for other people when I haven't really got the time to listen to myself and make do to my i-wants.It feels good, or maybe I'm just sick of d game of men, where they make u feel so compatible & comfortable, but in the end there's "I found someone" better still rather than "I'm bored with her & I miss u". WTH. They just don't know the car-crashed-heart feeling or just don't try to understand the "I'm trying 2 move on, give me space"... Kejam ok.
Looking at friends who are so deeply in love will somehow spike a pang of desperation to be part of an i-LOVE-u drama but another treble hits me hard--> how sure r u that it's gonna b owk n he won't leave u coz he can't stand your hours (I do have hectic schedule) n that he'll always be there through those grouchy bithcy days.. And accepting u as a whole n understands what u do for living (this is so important as I can b more obsessed in wat I do rather than u.hee.harap maklum). I would give a lot in return but I'm very picky at what I take coz heyy, kalo ujung2nya tetap gak ada yang bisa ikhlas mengerti and menjalani, mending gak usah. Kalo cintaaaa aja without the other important necessaries (as how daddy has listed) yaaa loe makan tu cinta.
So in the end, I decided to just stay like this. I feel more composed and focused.
C once pointed out "why do u have to be in a relationship? What r u trying to find? When right now, u should grasp a lot of life while young still perks" silakan menjawab :)
1. I need love? X ckp ke loving urself for d timebeing n with ur family n friends around? -- point taken n agreed
2. Wanting to feel special. Well u could make urself feel special when u've accomplished a huge block of ur dreams. Saye setuju.
3. Ok I don't have a number 3 actually. Heheh.
But in a way it's true. To some ppl it might sound very individualistic or selfish, but hey, drpd not tasting enough life now & later creating probs in marriage life,, better go all out now.
My time will come. It does for everyone doesn't it??
To delijelly, ur skies would be pink sooooner than u know it. Just don't give up yet owk.
To A.z. I hope u get me now.
To hensem, I'm clueless.
To feng tau, belajarlah bersyukur.
To life: ur beautiful :)
*i know it's too late but yeah*